After giving what was nothing short of a dissertation on the endless atrocities committed by government’s worldwide, I received one of the most profound suggestions:
Why don’t you just move to Somalia?
I didn’t know what to do or what to say. I’ve been a libertarian for 5 years and I’ve never heard this before. I quickly Googled “Somalia” and found that there’s no concrete representation of what could be considered a state.
As a libertarian, this sounded perfect. I researched the logistics of relocating my entire life to a land that resided a mere 8,619 miles away from my home. I really didn’t get along with my family anyhow, a bunch of small-government conservatives with a few liberals here and there. The endless nagging about how my tax dollars should at least be used for the military was gut-wrenching as it was.
My first consideration was the cost of the 1-way flight from Cleveland (CLE) to Hargeisa (HGA). The cheapest flight I found was $950 @ April 15th, 2016. The total flight duration would be 15+ hours.
The second concern was renouncing my US citizenship: $2,350.
My next concern was how I would make money in Somalia. I worked at a small tech. company in Cleveland, OH making $45k a year. Did Somalia even have tech companies? I had no clue, but the prospect of no government had me certain that it would be far easier to make a dime without all of the government bureaucracy and market intervention — not to mention the lack of bullshit fiat currency.
I didn’t exactly have $3.5k lying around. I had to make the money. So I did what any other libertarian/anarchist would do to raise money for an adventure across the globe; I begged for it:
I made it an even $10,000 because I knew it would take money to make money once I got there. $8,535 meant I would have around $5,000 after arriving.
Where the f*ck would I live?
I searched for “Somalia real estate” on Google and found this gem of an article:
F*ck yeah! I researched “Mugadishu Somalia real estate” and found a prime crib for $445 USD per month:
Something like this in the USSA would cost at least, what? $3.5k USD per month?
Shortly after sending my family an email that they’re all a bunch of pawns and the USD will collapse, I boarded the flight.
Was I nervous? Yes, but only because I hate flying. I knew becoming a Somalian would be the best decision I ever made. Upon arrival, I was greeted by a variety of ethiopian-looking dudes offering me a ride to my destination for the equivalent of $3 USD. Where can you get that kind of deal in the USSA?
“I can see clearly now, the rain is gone”
This has been the best decision I have ever made in my life. The view and the apparment is exactly what the above thumbnails look like. After a couple months I became acquainted with the local inhabitants, and aside from the occassional alarms of impending insurgent attacks, life here has been great.
How I Make Money
Because Mugadishu, Somalia is a city rebuilt, I did what any other libertarian/anarchist would do, I ran for office!
It took $850 USD, some spectacular campaign promises, and I got the job as mayor of Mugadishu, Somalia!
Now I can begin the process of dismantling the state of Somalia, from within!
Thank you, Mohamoud of Somalia